The Jokes Page
The Giraffe Collection
What do you call a bunch of giraffes all going in the same direction?
Giraffe-ic.
What do you call a bunch of giraffes all going in the same direction and stepping on grapes?
Giraffe-ic jam.
What do you call a bunch a giraffes just standing around?
Giraffe-ic park.
Random
On the planet of cows, what is the name of a major city?
Moo-shington DC. (I stupidly came up with the answer to this, but I guess others can work too, like Moo-York.)
Why do we like Mr. Mushroom?
Because he's a fun guy! (fun-gi)
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
One molar solution.
"Yo' teeth so yellow that when you walked into a church, the priest said: "I see the light!"
There were three men stranded on an island. They were captured by the natives, and approached by the chief who offered them three choices of punishment: Death or "Unga Bunga." The first one thought "I don't want to die, I'll just choose 'Unga Bunga'... whatever that is." So they took him to the jungle and shoved all sorts of crap up his butt... The second guy when asked said "I'm too young to die! Anything is better than an early death, I'll choose 'Unga Bunga.' " So they took him into the jungle and shoved all sorts of crap up his butt... The third person, from the rumors floating around the village, knew what unga bunga was...He thought to himself Ugh, shove stuff up my butt? Heck no, I'd rather die!!! "I choose death!" he proclaimed. The chief smiled and announced "Death........"
".......... by 'Unga Bunga' !!! "
A couple of bacon and eggs walk into a bar. The bartendar says, "Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here."
Hukilau Happy
Q: "Who does a baby panda look up to during the Christmas season?"
A: "Panda Claws!"
Q: "China has always been a hot-house for movie piracy. And often,
dupes of movies fabricated there fall victim to poor translation,
near-"perfect" Engrish, and culturally appropriate transliterations.
So... what should be the Chinglish title of the famous John
Cleese/Kevin Kline movies from the 80s?"
A: "A Fish Called Panda!"
Q: "Where do zookeepers send naughty pandas for observation?"
A: "To a Panda-opticon"
Q: What's a panda's favorite form of punctuation to encounter in the
morning?
A: Cereal commas
Q: What is a koala's favorite carbonated drink?
A: Coca Koala!